Which Type of Friends are You?

I've always treasured this thing called friendship, and I am very loyal to my friends. I'll go all out for them, and I won't hurt or use them for anything. It's a surprise that I could remember their birthdays without needing much effort on my part. Unfortunately, I didn't always get the same treatment in return, which made me think, is it because I'm a quiet person? Or someone that people used to take advantage of  - due to my weaker nature? Maybe when you give so much to someone, you'll expect something back in return. At least an acknowledgement that you're as important as that person is to you. I would be very hurt when my friends betray me, or didn't treat me as how I thought I deserved. Well, my perception on many of this slowly change, as I start to embrace reality...

My recent new venture into a field which I'm not familiar with woke me up. It's a dangerous game which I'm going into, and it involves a lot of people - something which I have never really get a good hands at, since I'm not really the sociable type. But I decided to give it a try, since I see a future with it. However, this game that I just ventured into, made me realised a lot of things. Here, I would only discuss one aspect of that, which is called friends.

First, I felt really blessed to know that I DO really have VERY GOOD and TRUE friends out there, who'll go all out for me. This, would be the friends that I'd keep with me because they actually went to check things out for me, and made sure that I won't get into any trap of any kind. Regardless whether they intend to join me or not, they actually put in extra effort to make sure that I'll be in good hands. You know who you are, girls and I'm truly blessed to have you as my friends.

Then, I'm also very fortunate to have friends who would give me 100% moral support, because they knew that I'm trying out something new for myself. Some made it clear that they didn't want to be involved, some just played along, but I do know that they're actually just giving me some moral support. And they even help me build the line! These friends are priceless, I couldn't thank them more.

Another category of friends are those that would not hurt me, they tend to beat around the bush by giving lots of excuses, but never dare to say no. They will continue to entertain, but I could sense that they do try to keep a distant if possible. Why? Because they're afraid that I'll drag them into this venture of mine as well. I would say, they're just sitting on the fence and watch the show from there.

And lastly, it's sad to note that most of the people whom I thought were my friends all this while, acted in ways that disappointed me a lot. These people tend to jump in when they see opportunities, but disappear right away when they thought the opportunities would benefit the other party more. There were also people who'd use their friend for their own interest. I'm thankful that I haven't come across unanswered phone calls, or people starting to walk away when they saw me approaching, but I do feel that if I'm persistant, I might get a cold shoulder from these category of people. But it doesn't hurt me an inch, because I'm well prepared for this. I knew what I'm plunging into, and I could accept this. It's just a matter of how I want to play this game further - and understand human nature along the way.

Well, I might not find my answer in this new venture, but I would not regret it at all because of all the priceless experience that I'd gained. I knew that it's a matter on how I see myself, my priorities, my family, and also about people around me. Also it's purely from the sharing perspective that I'm including my friends in this, not so much on my personal gain. It's really a win-win situation, depending on how you would like to look at it. To me, even though if I decided to quit one day, I'd know that I've done that, been that and I'm so much more wiser now :)

Oh Why Do I Procrastinate?

Sometimes, we knew we had to do 'something'
but always kept putting them off,
Either reschedule them to another time,
When we're not so busy, or not so tired,
With the hope of being able to continue
with what we've left off previously,
But little did we know,
if we continue to procrastinate,
we might end up not able to do that 'something' anymore!

Just last long weekend, my mom was asking me to drop her off at her sister and brother's house up north for a visit, but because she saw how busy my schedule was, and was afraid that it would burden me & my family (my kids were not feeling too well then), she told me that it's ok. She'll postpone the trip later. Furthermore, her legs were giving her problems so she thought of resting first before making that visit.

Well, just this morning, my mom got a call saying that my dear auntie has passed away. I felt a sharp knife just went thru my heart. Oh why did I procrastinate? Why didn't I insist to bring them over last time? Why do I gave in to my hectic schedule and priorities then?

Why, so many whys... and yet I couldn't turn the clock back. I felt really miserable now.... Ah, if only I didn't procrastinate. It's time for me to revisit my priorities in life - because time and tide wait for no man. I silently offered up my prayers and blessings for my eldest Aunty, may she find grace with God, and rest in peace always.