6 Years Down Memory Lane

I still have not blogged about SY's birth journal. Even after 6 years has passed, it's still fresh in my memory. Well, not to the details like when I had my contraction pains, etc... but I knew I have written it down somewhere in my diary, and even hubby made notes of it for me. Even SY has always asked me to re-tell the story to her over and over again.

This time 6 years ago, which also happened to be a Tuesday, I was in the labour room, timing my contraction pain. I was admitted to the hospital around this time, after observing spotting at ~7++ am. So, that day, I didn't report to work, sent a message to my boss and then hubby bought wanton noodles for breakfast. By the time I arrived in hospital, I was sent to the monitoring room to see how strong my contraction pain was. It was very strong, I couldn't really remember now how frequent apart (maybe 10 minutes?). So I was admitted, and my obs broke my water bag at ~12noon. I pleaded with him not to put me on drips because I want a natural delivery. He was not very happy, but he accommodated my request. 

By 2pm, still very poor progress of dilation. But the pain was still bearable, even though very strong. I remembered the nurses even helped me dilate. But alas! My obs came in at 7pm, looked at my condition (I only dilated up till 6cm), and told me I had to go for emergency C-sec. I argued with him, and asked him to give me more time. Somehow I believe that I could still make it for natural delivery. I remembered that time, all my family members were praying for me remotely. Hubby kept them posted of my condition thru sms, and we said the Rosary. Outside, hubby's family members gathered. 

The obs asked hubby to go outside for awhile, and scolded him! He said, "You engineers thought you know everything, and didn't want to listen to me. You have to ask your wife to agree to go for c-sec. The baby's condition is in danger, blah blah blah". In the end, hubby came in, and talked to me. My MIL was very worried and asked me to go for c-sec. I think I still hanged on till 10pm. I thought I could drag till the next day, because somehow I was misled by a superstitious feeling in me. Earlier that day (or maybe the day before), MIL has told hubby that 13 Dec was not a good day to give birth (she refers to a chinese calendar). And that remark had somehow affected me. So, besides wanting to try for natural birth badly (I've always prepared myself for a natural delivery, and never imagined I could not do it), that remark had caused me to want to delay it till the next day. Thinking of it now, I realised how foolish and superstitious I was. 

I finally agreed to go for c-sec after 10++ pm. By then, the anaesthetic had gone home, so we had to wait. I later learnt that my doctor had secretly prepared the operating theater at 7pm, even though he agreed to let me wait. Well, I vaguely remembered signing a paper before the operation, before I fell unconscious. I thought I was half-conscious when I was signing the paper giving my permission to operate me. The next I knew, I was wheeled out of the operating theater, still very drowsy, and heard my hubby telling me, "Our girl looks exactly like you! I'll beat her buttock for putting you in such pain". Look like our precious little girl came out before midnight :)

I also remembered when I was fully awake, I was alone in the ward. I asked the nurse about my baby. When she carried little SY to me, I saw her smiling at me! How sweet, and that time, my tears welled up. It's such joy to see my little darling finally. 

Even though I missed seeing my little girl came out from my tummy, hubby recorded everything for me. I saw his family members waiting outside anxiously, and when my girl was out, the paed showed her to my hubby. I'm so glad everything turned out so nicely, and I praised and thank God for such a beautiful gift for us. Indeed, I learnt my lesson - not to be superstitious again, everyday is a good day. 

Happy birthday, Sze Yi darling. You're my princess always. 

Doggies Cookies in the Making

Wow, it's been a year since my girl volunteered me to make sandwiches for her class party. Luckily this year, she came back and asked me first. After some thought, I suggested that we tried the doggies cookies (recipes from here). Since we had a long weekend around the corner, we did a trial run a week in advance. 

SJ went with me to shop for all the ingredients and even accompanied me from start to nearly the end. But she couldn't really help, because the ears just won't stick. I was having a hard time with the ears myself. I guess maybe I put too much flour (since my measurements were just 'agak-agak'). After having a very slow progress, I decided to add more butter, and that seemed to help a little. Not long later, SY came back from Amah's house and luckily we're not done yet so she got to do a few. 

Funny shaped-doggies - I was rather frustrated as the ears kept dropping off 

So, I ended up making bigger face doggies to hold the ears better, and can finish faster as well. In the process, my girls kept taxing the koko-crunch and the chocolate chips. SJ especially will break them and told me it's spoilt, so she might as well eat it (LOL!)

Finally, fresh out from the oven. I think it's slightly over-baked

I let the girls bring some to school to share out with some close friends the next day. And they came back telling me that the ears and noses fell off, all doggies were out of shape! Now, how come none of my blogger friends who had tried this a few years back never complained about this? What did I do wrong to have falling ears all the time? I will have to think of a good way to pack them nicely next week...

I really hope someone can tell me how I can further improve the 'ears' problem - for both before and after the baking process....

I'll Move On

It's not as easy as I thought, but I'll manage...

Moving On

When one door of happiness closes, another opens,

but often we look so long at the closed door

that we do not see the one that has been opened for us.

- Helen Keller

It's finally over. Time for me to move on. I guess I could never understand why, how or when. But the sight will be forever etched in my memory. 

I learnt a great lesson - the hard way. Never ever take things for granted. Maybe God has other plans for me, I don't know. But I do know that He's finally answered my prayer. Whether He'll give me a 2nd chance or not, time will tell. And I will need to continue to have faith in Him, no matter how difficult for me to accept this. 

As I close this chapter and move on, I prayed that God will continue to take good care of us and bless us always, giving us the perseverance and strength to carry on.

Grasping Life's Reality...

Birthday reflections...

Inside every older person is a younger person - wondering what the hell happened. - Cora Harvey Armstrong

Have you ever attended a birthday party meant for others (but not you) on your actual birthday? How does it feel? When everyone (including you) will be singing a birthday song for the birthday babies, but none was directed to you?

Well, I have the privilege to experience one this year, and it's really meaningful! Really, especially when they drilled into you how much suffering your mom have to go thru in order to give you a birthday. I am the mom and the birthday girl today. So I can't help it that I was especially touched when I hear the story about the boy & the apple tree. It reminds me so much of how much sacrifice my parents have to go thru in order to give me life and the best things of life. I, in turn, did I show them enough how much I appreciated them?

When you turn thirty, a whole new thing happens: you see yourself acting like you parents. 

- Blair Sabol

It's been two years since I last talked about checkpoint. Birthdays are just checkpoint for us to know if we've done our part in life.

“And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.”

This year, I'm no longer considered young. That reminds me that my parents are neither so - I aged with them year by year. As I grow wiser in life, have I done my part in caring for my parents and be there for them as how they have been for me all these while? Well, even if I did, I know it's never enough. I don't think I could ever repay them for all they have done. That's why this birthday, I thank them instead of waiting for them to wish me "happy birthday". I owe my birthday to them, if they have decided not to bring me to life, I won't be here today. That's why I'm especially thankful to God for giving me such loving parents and it's all the more wonderful when your parents told you that you're their best gift in their life. Well, I'm so lucky that my parents kept reminding me about this, and I felt their birthday and parent's day messages were really touching and unique - won't you agree so?

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. - Robert Frost

Why Does Weaning Have to Come with Guilt?

I have been reminding my little one that she should stop nursing when she turned 3. And she nodded every time in agreement. However, after awhile, she would ask me, "I'm not 3 yet right, Mommy? So I can still drink your nen nen?" As you can guess, I always give in to her.

I have tried to wean her off many times, without much success. Maybe it's because I didn't try hard enough. Why? How could you say "No" when she looked up at you with such pleading eyes, and a promise that it'll be the last time ever? I was quite successful with lemon once, a tips from a breastfeeding mother. However, I washed it away after a few times because I felt guilty - seeing how pitifully she cried after tasting it.

Since then, I tried to reason with her. That she's now a big girl, and so she has to drink milk from the bottle (she used to drink from the cup at school and at home sometimes, but always declined the bottle). I couldn't remember when she started to accept the bottle, and from then, she has been drinking formula at least once or twice a day at home. Then, I have successfully got her to drink milk from the bottle before bedtime, with the promise that she could drink from mine after that. It was not easy to convince her at first, that's why I introduced the pacifier to her. Yes, you might wonder, at such age? She looked at it as a toy, really. So I told her if she wanted the pacifier, then she had to drink milk from the bottle, and stopped taking from Mommy's. Surprisingly, it's not successful, a paci could never replace Mommy's - for her case.   

Well, the closest I've nearly weaned her off was when I cooked up a story about the Tooth Fairy. She joined in the excitement of waiting for the Tooth Fairy to get her a pressie in exchange of her pacifier, and keeping her promise to only drink milk from the bottle. Well, she's very close to succeed, she never once requested milk from me, even though she had difficulty sleeping. Not until towards very late at night, and she asked me, "Just a little bit, Mommy?" And true enough, she stopped after taking a few suckles. 

Last week, I finally succeeded in making her drink milk from the bottle in the morning, before she went to school. That's a great milestone, because it not only improved her temperament while preparing her for school, but it also eased the coming transition that I had in mind for her - when she finally turned 3. Of course, it came with a hefty price to pay, because I always ended up late for work while trying to coax her to drink from the bottle, but the end results was very rewarding.

It's been 2 days after she turned 3, and I can say it's very successful so far. How? Yes, the lemon. At first I thought she started to like the taste afterall, but luckily, it's still working now. She took a taste, made her face and said, "I'll wait for Mommy's nen nen to become not so spicy, ya". I felt guilty every time she said that. I tried to cajole her to try again, maybe it's not so spicy now? She would push me away and prefer me to hug her or pat her to sleep. Sigh... should I wash it away? 

TGIF!

I've never felt more grateful for the arrival of a Friday in my life. Not so much that it's time to wrap up my work for the week and switched into the weekend mood, but it also means no more laundry to do! Well, that was before our washing machine gave way and stopped draining. If it didn't decide to suddenly strike on us, that would mean more laundry since that's the only time I can maximise the help from Mr. Sunshine out there while I'm not at work.

It's been two weeks that our washer was out of function, which also means that's how long we had to hand-wash all our clothes. It's a lucky thing that hubby sweetly volunteered to take turns with me, so we get to rest one day in between. Yes, we had to do our laundry everyday because we only bought 2 sets of uniforms for the kids, so if we skip one day, they won't have a uniform to wear the next day. That's how important it is to wash every single day. 

Poor me

While it's easier to wash the kids' clothings, that's not so with the adults' clothings. We both ended up having back-aches all over, and Hubby even declared that he hated washing clothes with both his hands on facebook right after he completed this task by the 2nd week :) Seriously, we sure hope the technician would quickly source the faulty part and fix it for us. MIL even suggested that we get a new one while waiting for the old one to be fixed, or dump the old one entirely without fixing it. Sigh, if only we have more luxury to buy such convenience. 

So what happened to the laundry on a weekend? They got transported to a home laundry service, FOC. Not only that, it came back nicely pressed and folded, something which I wouldn't be able to accomplish with each wash myself. So, maybe that's why we didn't really bother to chase the technician for the fix, you got what I mean? (wink!). 

Well, I couldn't be more grateful to this 3 aids in my life right now - 

a. the washer for the much precious time it helped us saved from washing those clothes ourselves, the many backaches that we could have avoided, the efficient draining skill that expedite the otherwise long drying process, and the unavoidable worries that came from seeing the clothes piling higher each day.  

b. the man of my life, for willingly share out the workload (and backaches too) without any complain (apart from his release of emotion in facebook recently!). 

c. and of course, MIL for always being there for us, whenever we need it - for such wonderful service. 

Now, wouldn't you say I'm the most fortunate person on earth? :) Ah... how I wish I could have all 3 of this....

 Now, I did own 2 of these, but none of which were functioning at the moment....

The 40 Days...

It's the time of the year again, and I find this very meaningful to share here. Even though this was forwarded to me a year ago, I still find it a refreshing read. 


WHAT IS LENT?
Historically, Lent is the 40-day period before Easter, which the Church uses to prepare for the celebration of our Lord Jesus Christ's Resurrection on Easter Sunday.


WHEN DOES LENT BEGIN?
Lent begins on Ash Wednesday,  the day on which they faithfully have their foreheads signed with ashes in the form of a Cross. It ends at noon on Holy Saturday. The 40 days excludes the five Sundays of Lent.


Why are foreheads marked with a cross on Ash Wednesday?
In the Bible a mark on the forehead is a symbol of a person's ownership. By having the forehead marked with the sign of a cross, it symbolizes that the person belongs to Jesus Christ, who died on a Cross. This is in imitation of the spiritual mark or seal that is put on a Christian at baptism, where he is delivered from slavery to sin and the devil, and made a servant of righteousness and Christ (Romans 6:3-18). It is also in imitation of the way the righteous are described in the book of Revelation: "Do not harm the earth or the sea or the trees, till we have sealed the servants of our God upon their foreheads." (Revelations 7:3)


Why is the signing done with ashes?
Ashes are a biblical symbol of mourning and penance. In Bible times the custom was to fast, wear sackcloth, sit in dust and ashes, and put dust and ashes on one's head. While we no longer normally wear sackcloth or sit in dust and ashes, the customs of fasting and putting ashes on one's forehead as a sign of mourning and penance have survived to this day. These are the two key distinctions of Lent. In fact, Ash Wednesday is a day not only for putting ashes on one's head, but also a day of fasting.


Is there another significance to the ashes?
Yes. It also symbolize death and so to remind us of our mortality. Thus when the priest uses his thumb to sign one of the faithful with the ashes, he says, "Remember, that thou art dust and unto dust thou shalt return," which is modeled after God's address to Adam (Gen 3:19; Job 34:15; Ps 90:3; Ps 104:29, Ecc 3:20). This also echoes the words at a burial, "Ashes to ashes; dust to dust," which is based on God's words to Adam and Abraham's confession, "I am nothing but dust and ashes" (Gen 18:27). It is thus a reminder of our mortality and our need to repent before this life is over and we face our Creator.


Where do the ashes used on Ash Wednesday come from?
They are made by burning palm fronds which have been saved from the previous year's Palm Sunday, they are then blessed by a priest -- blessed ashes have been used in God's rituals since the time of Moses (Num 19:9-10, 17).


Why are ashes from the previous year's Palm Sunday used?
Palm Sunday was when the people rejoiced at Jesus' triumphal entrance to Jerusalem. They celebrated his arrival by waving palm fronds, little realizing that he was coming to die for their sins. By using palms from Palm Sunday, it is a reminder that we must not only rejoice of Jesus' coming but also regret the fact that our sins made it necessary for him to die for us in order to save us from hell.


Why are Sundays excluded from the reckoning of the forty days?
Because Sunday is the day on which Christ rose, making it an inappropriate day to fast and mourn of our sins. On Sunday we must celebrate Christ's Resurrection for our salvation. It is Friday on which we commemorate his death for our sins. The Sundays of the year are days of celebration and the Fridays of the year are days of penance.


Why is Lent forty days long?
40 days is a traditional number of discipline, devotion, and preparation in the Bible. Moses stayed on the Mountain of God 40 days (Ex 24:18, 34:28), Elijah traveled 40 days before he reached the cave where he had his vision (1 Kings 19:8), Nineveh was given 40 days to repent (Jon 3:4), and most importantly, prior to undertaking his ministry, Jesus spent 40 days in the wilderness praying and fasting (Matt 4:2).   


Since Lent is a period of prayer and fasting, it is fitting for Christians to imitate  Lord with a 40-day period. Christ used a 40-day period of prayer and fasting to prepare for his ministry, which culminated in his death and resurrection, and thus it is fitting for Christians to imitate him with a 40-day period of prayer and fasting to prepare for the celebration of his ministry's climax, Good Friday (His crucifixion) and Easter Sunday (His Resurrection). 


Thus the Catechism of the Catholic Church states: "'For we have not a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tested as we are, yet without sinning' [Heb 4:15]. By the solemn forty days of Lent the Church unites herself each year to the mystery of Jesus in the desert." (CCC 540).


Why are the forty days called Lent?
They are called Lent because that is the Old English word for spring. Not just because it is the season of the year during which it falls, but because Lent is the Church's Springtime during which we start fresh. This is something unique to English. In almost all other languages, Lent's name is a derivative of the Latin term, Quadragesima, or "the forty days."


What is a day of fast and abstinence?
Under current Canon law in the Western Rite of the Church, a day of fast is one on which Catholics who are eighteen to sixty years old are required to keep a limited fast. In most countries, one may eat a single, normal meal and have two snacks, so long as these snacks do not add up to a second meal. Children are not required to fast, but their parents must ensure they are properly educated in the spiritual practice of fasting. Those with medical conditions requiring a greater or more regular food intake can easily be dispensed from the requirement of fasting by their pastor. A day of abstinence is a day on which Catholics fourteen years or older are required to abstain from eating meat. Again, persons with special dietary needs can easily be dispensed by their pastor.


Is there a biblical basis for abstaining from meat as a sign of repentance?
Yes. The book of Daniel states: "In the third year of Cyrus king of Persia . . . 'I, Daniel, mourned for three weeks. I ate no choice food; no meat or wine touched my lips; and I used no lotions at all until the three weeks were over.'" (Daniel 10:1-3) 


By giving up good things and denying them to ourselves we encourage an attitude of humility, free ourselves from dependence on them, cultivate the spiritual discipline of being willing to make personal sacrifices, and remind ourselves of the importance of spiritual goods over earthly goods. Since the Catholic Church only requires abstinence from meat on a temporary basis, it clearly does not regard meat is immoral. Instead, it regards it as the giving up of a good thing (which in less economically developed regions -- including the whole world until very recently -- was expensive and thus eaten at festive occasions, making it a sign of rejoicing) to attain a spiritual goal.


On what basis does the Church have the authority to establish days of fast and abstinence?
On the authority of Jesus Christ who told the leaders of His Church, "Whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven" (Matthew 16:19, 18:18). The language of binding and loosing (in part) was a rabbinic way of referring to the ability to establish binding halakah or rules of conduct for the faith community. To approach the issue from another angle, every family has the authority to establish particular family devotions for its members. Thus if the parents decide that the family will engage in a particular devotion at a particular time (say, Bible reading after supper), it is a sin for the children to disobey and skip the devotion for no good reason. In the same way, the Church as the family of God has the authority to establish its own family devotion, and it is a sin for the members of the Church to disobey and skip the devotions for no good reason (though of course if the person has a good reason, the Church dispenses him immediately).


In addition to Ash Wednesday, are any other days during Lent days of fast or abstinence?
Yes. All Fridays during Lent are days of abstinence. Also, Good Friday, the day on which Christ was crucified, is another day of both fast and abstinence. All days in Lent are appropriate for fasting or abstaining, but Canon law does not require fasting on these days. Such fasting or abstinence is voluntary, like a freewill offering.


Why are Fridays during Lent days of abstinence?
This is because Jesus died for our sins on Friday, making it an especially appropriate day of mourning our sins (just as Sunday, the day on which he rose for our salvation is an especially appropriate day to rejoice) by denying ourselves something we enjoy. During the rest of the year Catholics in this country are permitted to use a different act of penance on Friday in place of abstinence, though all Fridays are days of penance on which we are required to do something expressing sorrow for our sins, just as Sundays are holy days on which we are required to worship and celebrate God's great gift of salvation.


Are acts of repentance appropriate on other days during Lent?
Yes. Thus the Code of Canon Law states: "All Fridays through the year and the time of Lent are penitential days and time throughout the universal Church" (CIC 1250).


What are appropriate activities for ordinary days during Lent?
Giving up something we enjoy for Lent, doing physical or spiritual acts of mercy for others, prayer, fasting and abstinence, attention to our duties, and going to confession and other acts expressing repentance in general.


Why are acts of repentance appropriate at this time of year?
Because it is the time leading up to the commemoration of Our Lord's death for our sins and the commemoration of his resurrection for our salvation. It is thus especially appropriate to mourn the sins for which he died. Humans have an innate psychological need to mourn tragedies, and our sins are tragedies of the greatest sort. Due to our fallen nature, humans also have a need to have set times in which to engage in behavior (which is why we have Sundays as a set time to rest and worship, since we would otherwise be likely to forget to devote sufficient time to rest and worship), it is appropriate to have set times of repentance. Lent is one of those set times.


Is the custom of giving up something for Lent mandatory?
No. However, it is a good and beneficial custom, and parents or caretakers may choose to require it of their children to encourage their spiritual training, which is their prime responsibility in the raising of their children.


Since Sundays are not counted in the forty days of Lent, does the custom of giving up something apply to them?
Customarily, no. However, since the giving up of something is voluntary to begin with, there is no official rule concerning this aspect of it. Nevertheless, since Sundays are days of celebration, it is appropriate to suspend the Lenten self-denial on them, in a spiritual and non-excessive way, we may celebrate the day of Our Lord's resurrection so that that day and that event may be contrasted with the rest of the days of Lent and the rest of the events of history. This heightened contrast deepens the spiritual lessons taught by the rest of Lent.


Why is giving up something for Lent such a good and beneficial custom?
By denying ourselves something we enjoy, we discipline our wills so that we are not slaves to our pleasures. Just as indulging the pleasure of eating leads to physical flabbiness and, if this is great enough, an inability to perform in physically demanding situations, indulging in pleasure in general leads to spiritual flabbiness and, if this is great enough, an inability to perform in spiritual demanding situations, we when the demands of morality require us to sacrifice something pleasurable (such as sex before marriage or not within the confines of marriage) or endure hardship (such as being scorned or persecuted for the faith). By disciplining the will to refuse pleasures when they are not sinful, a habit is developed which allows the will to refuse pleasures when they are sinful. There are few better ways to keep one's priorities straight than by periodically denying ourselves things of lesser priority to show us that they are not necessary and focus our attention on what is necessary. 


Is denying of pleasure an end in itself?
No. It is only a means to an end. By training ourselves to resist temptations when they are not sinful, we train ourselves to reject temptations when they are sinful. We also express our sorrow over having failed to resist sinful temptations in the past.


Is there such a thing as denying ourselves too many pleasures?
Most definitely. First, God made human life contingent on certain goods, such as food, and to refuse to enjoy enough of them has harmful consequences. For example, if we do not eat enough food it can cause physical damage or (in the extreme, even death). Just as there is a balance between eating too much food and not eating enough food, there is a balance involved in other goods. Second, if we do not strike the right balance and deny ourselves goods God meant us to have then it can generate resentment toward God, which is a spiritual sin just as much as those of engaging in excesses of good things. Thus one can be led into sin either by excess or by defect in the enjoyment of good things. Third, it can decrease our effectiveness in ministering to others. Fourth, it can deprive us of the goods God gave us in order that we might praise him. Fifth, it constitutes the sin of ingratitude by refusing to enjoy the things God wanted us to have because he loves us. If a child refused every gift his parent gave him, it would displease the parent, and if we refuse gifts God has given us, it displeases God because he loves us and wants us to have them.


A side from Ash Wednesday, which begins Lent, what are its principal events?
There are a variety of saints' days which fall during Lent, and some of these change from year to year since the dates of Lent itself change based on when Easter falls. However, the Sundays during the Lenten season commemorate special events in the life of Our Lord, such as his Transfiguration and his Triumphal Entrance into Jerusalem on Palm Sunday, which begins Holy Week. Holy Week climaxes with Holy Thursday, on which Christ celebrated the first Mass, Good Friday, on which he was Crucified, and Holy Saturday -- the last day of Lent -- during which Our Lord lay in the Tomb before his Resurrection on Easter Sunday, the first day after Lent.


Fasting for Lent
For centuries, Christians have observed the season of Lent by fasting from food and observing other self-denying acts. 


These acts help us become more aware of our true needs. When we deny ourselves the comforts we are used to—whether a full plate of food, or some other part of our daily routine (TV, coffee, alcohol, Internet, etc.)— we are more mindful of our great need for God. Also, when we deny our sinful desires, we become more acutely aware of them, for when they are not fed, they tend to surface in more noticeable ways. Most importantly, these practices make us mindful of our need for salvation by Jesus' death on the cross.


Removing Distractions
What follows is some suggestions for ways to fast. None of these are compulsory. Remember that the important thing is to take away distractions, to focus instead on the mercy, salvation, and comforting provision of God. Make time and space for God, and God will meet you.


What can I give up?
First, some important considerations: if you have any concerns about whether dietary fasting (fasting from food) is safe for you, ask your physician, especially if you have a health concern (heart, diabetes). Don't fast from food if your are pregnant or nursing; make sure you always get plenty of fluids; and finally, don't make decisions for others (for example, don't modify a child's diet except to help them decide to cut nonessentials like sodas or desserts, etc.). 


You know yourself best: which of the following might you do without? Try adding to your list each week (see the individual pages of the Calendar to read more specific suggestions). If you fast from all the food items listed in the Calendar pages, you may find that at the end of several weeks, you are eating very simply: vegetables, beans, rice, fruit, grains, etc. Take the suggestions one step at a time and make sure you do what is necessary to have energy for your work and family.


Suggested fast items:
Food: Meats, poultry (eggs too), fats and oils, soft drinks, second helpings, alcohol, coffee (try tea or some other low-caffeine drink if you get headaches), dairy (milk and cheese), junk food (chips, snacks, excessively salty food), candy (plus refined sugar in general), and dessert (great for kids—very meaningful!). 


Media: TV, movies, computer, email (set an autoresponder), Internet, magazines, radio, the phone (leave your cell phone off when appropriate), handheld computers, video games, and other technology. 


Other Things: You may want to fast from certain relationships, or people in general, choosing instead to walk alone with God for a period. You may also fast from social events, parties, or clubs, if you regularly go out of your way for that kind of gathering. 


Days: Leave it all behind: leave junk food, TV, cars, noise, and all the media and messages of the culture. Pack the very minimum (water, warm clothes, etc.) and find a trail, or a beach, and feast on God. 


Imitate Jesus, who took whole days to walk alone in the wilderness fasting and praying. Give God the time and the room that he wants. God wants to fill you up, wants to bless you. If we are constantly pouring other stuff into our heads or stomachs, there will be little room for God.


On what days should I fast?
Fast on any day but Sunday, which is a feast day even in Lent. On Friday (the day of the crucifixion), many world Christians will fast from meat, and it can be meaningful to join them. Try fasting from something on each day, Monday-Saturday. You may choose one day to fast from all foods or other comforts for as much of the day that you can (remembering to drink plenty of fluids). End your weekly fast on Sunday: on this day, enjoy your food and your freedom! 


When you fast, do not put on a sad face as the hypocrites do. They neglect their appearance so that everyone will see that they are fasting. I assure you, they have already been paid in full. When you go without food, wash your face and comb your hair, so that others cannot know that you are fasting—only your Father, who is unseen, will know. And your Father, who sees what you do in private, will reward you. (Matthew 6:16-18 - TEV) 

Rules for Being Human

Something inspirational to start off the week...



In life, no one is given a handbook to guide them down the "right" path. There are always opportunities to grow, and you must make the most of the lessons you learn in order to evolve as a person. You are constantly learning -- from both your mistakes and your successes -- but how you apply this knowledge is solely up to you. 

A Matter of Faith - From a Child's Perspective

When hubby and I agreed to tie the knot, we came to a consensus that we'd let the children decide on their faith when they are 'matured' enough. Of course, we would guide them along the way, given the fact that we couldn't let them choose their own school, or certain things which we felt we're in a better position to decide for them at this age.

However, given the circumstances that it's a mixed marriage, it's only fair to let them choose later. Even though it's my responsibility as a Catholic parent to do all I could to guide them closer to God, the final call is still not within my control. I trust that God will take care of everything for me, and a broken marriage would be the last on His list. So, there's really no point arguing over whose side the kids should take, because a happy family is all that matters. Furthermore, all religion teach us to be good.

Now, as we journey in faith together, I wouldn't deny that it's not easy to juggle with so many differences, especially when it's not just about the two of us, but when two families are involved. We'll have to give and take most of the time. Indeed, if things were not handled wisely, but rather too clouded by emotion, the one that suffers most would be the children.

During these years, we did our best on how well we could educate them on this subject. We exposed them as much as we could to both religions. And I was amazed at how well SY coped with this (she's matured enough to understand certain things at this age). SJ was still too young to understand, so she she just went with the flow most of the time.

Actually I brought this up because I wanted to record down some funny or touching moments that we had, especially when you see it from a child's perspective. Some may or may not be of direct relevant, but it's still good to lump them here.

E.P.A: Environmental Protection Agency

Scenario 1: 
SY tends to jump sides very easily. One day, she would tell me that when she grows up, she wants to be a Christian like me, and ask SJ to follow Daddy. But when she's talking to Daddy, she can switch very fast, and say the reverse thing. So when both of us are around, she would hesitate and say, "Erm, how ler... I want to follow Mommy and also Daddy". So we'll tell them it's ok, she didn't need to choose now yet. My, she felt so relieved!

Scenario 2:
Every morning when we drop them at school, there's this guy who would stand in front of the school compound and greet them with "Good Morning, Amitabha". And they were asked to put their hands together and bowed slightly while saying that. So they will call that man Amitable Uncle. It's funny to hear them say among themselves, "Let's see if the Amitable Uncle is here or not".

Scenario 3: 
They learnt how to say their graces before meals after attending school. Sometimes, they practise this at home as well. Of course, we're all 'forced' to say it together with them. I had to explain to SY that I can't say this, as I'm a Christian (They say thank you to Buddha, Thank you to the priest, etc..). I explained to her that I would say thank you to Jesus instead of to Buddha. And when she said Amitable to me, I replied with Amen to her. She showed me a level of understanding that I suddenly realised she has grown up. For instance, she would know that I can't do certain things so she'll add, "It's ok, Mommy can be excused. That's because she prays to Jesus".

Scenario 4: 
We're attending Mass in church. All the congregation stood up for the entrance hymn. Then suddenly, I saw SY whispered something into hubby's ear, so he sat down again. Apparently, SY told him only Christian can stand up, Buddhists have to sit down. We can't help laughing but I told hubby to stand back up as a sign of respect.

Scenario 5: 
Well, I still do my part the best I could. I would bring them to church, even if it means going alone with 2 kids, unless I wanted to have some quiet time alone, then I'll leave them at home. One day, I took them to the new church because I've missed the Mass at the church that I regularly go to, as this new church has Mass on a Sunday evening. Since it's my first time there (or was it 2nd? the first time I reached there by accident!), I lost my way, so both girls were busy helping me find the direction (as if they knew!). SJ has not had her afternoon nap, so she was dozing off. However, every time I pointed out that "Oh dear, SJ has slept", she would replied me with "No lar, I'm helping Mommy to find the way". And not long later, I saw her nodding off again. This could repeat for a few more times, until I finally found the place.

Scenario 6: 
I bought a little Bible for kids during Christmas last year. Ever since then, it has become their bedtime story. They will request me to read a few stories for them every night, SY would ask for 2, and SJ would choose another 2. In fact, SY could read them all on her own now, and she even read to SJ when I'm busy.

Isn't it amazing to hear such words from a girl who's not even 6 yet? I couldn't imagine what to expect a few more years down the road... but it's surely something to be praised!

With faith nothing is impossible

Are you ready for the Rabbit Year?

This year, Chinese New Year comes a bit too fast. We've not really gotten over Christmas and it's time to eat, shop, spring-clean and put up a new deco again.

Well, if you ran out of ideas or time to greet the Rabbit year, try this...

The Theory Behind an Argument

I find this too interesting not to post about it. It was brought up by hubby during a discussion. He suddenly asked me why when 2 people argue over something, they have to raise their voices. My simple-mindedness told me that it's associated with our emotion - we laugh when we're happy, we cry when we're sad, and we raise our voice when we try to bring out a point.

However, Hubby had something else in mind. He pointed out that people had to raise their voices in an argument because their hearts and minds are too far apart. The more disagreement they have, the further their hearts are away from each other. Thus, in order to get their message across such a long 'distance', the louder the voices need to be raised.

Now, this explains why lovers hardly talk, they whisper. That's because their hearts are at the same page.
In fact, some couples hardly communicate. They just exchange eye contact to get the message across. That's because their minds and hearts are so close to each other that they didn't even need to say it out.

Ridiculous? Well, it's very logical, don't you think so? Now, the next time you are having an argument with someone, try to see things from his perspective, and let me know if eye contact works!